Sort-of-Single Mom How to have a fabulous family weekend when Dad is away

When was the last time you went out on a Saturday night as a third wheel with another couple? How about hosting a dinner party solo? Perhaps meeting friends to go dancing? When you were single, you probably did all of these things and had a blast. I know I did! But if you’re married with young children, making plans with other couples or families can be awkward and out-of balance when your other half is away on business or a guy’s weekend.

Playing the part of Mom and Dad on the weekends is twice as challenging as going it alone Monday through Friday. During the week, we Moms pretty much have it down. Those of us who go to an office outside the home have carefully planned childcare that keeps the carefully planned schedule intact and the meals handled. The stay-at-home and work-at-home Moms merrily plod their way through carved-in-stone school days, carpools, sports and hobby classes, hosting playgroups in rotation, healthy meals packed in lunch boxes, library day, nap time, snack time, bath time, bed time and finally MY TIME. But the weekend, well this is just a wide-open landscape without routines, scheduled activities, mandatory obligations, strict bedtimes or any guarantees whatsoever. In other words, no built-in breaks or long list of available mom-pals. (This is their family time, the kind you’re not having).

Next time you find yourself in the role of Sort-of-Single-Mom, don’t spill your guts to a phone solicitor. Instead, try these tips:

2. Put the non-essential chores aside for 48 hours. Resist the temptation to “get ahead on the household” since you’re not going out on your usual Saturday night date. Use the time you would have devoted to chores for pampering yourself, including a home pedicure, facial mud mask or deep conditioning your hair. Aim to feel refreshed by Monday morning, not spent.

4. Be a kid with your kids (kind of). Allow yourself to be a “passenger” and not always the “driver”; it’s liberating to let go of the decision-making and just follow. Be silly and giggle with the kids. Play board games and cards and that old whispering game Telephone. Tell them stories about your childhood and share a few old secrets. Have a talent show at home. Take turns giving back massages. Let the kids put on a fashion show to music...in your clothing!

6. Ask for help if you need it. Depending on the ages and stages of your children, sometimes a full weekend on-duty is physically overwhelming. This is nothing to be ashamed of! Get the pre-teen next door to do some Mother’s Helper time. Allow Grandma to lighten your load, and steal off to an afternoon movie matinee, bike ride or yoga class. Everybody wins when Mom is rejuvenated.

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